Best Ad of All Time?

Just flipping through a couple youtube videos minding my own business wasting time and this sensational advertisement comes on before I get to enjoy my WWE top 10 royal rumble returns video. Absolutely incredible.

Just right out of the gun. "Hey there you sexually deprived Suck Baaaags." Guy instantly gained my attention. "Are you struggling with the ladies? I bet you are you fat slob?" How the fuck did he know? Its like he knew someone watching WWE videos at 11 in the morning was kind of a piece of garbage. So at this time I had the option to skip the ad and move onto my video. Yeah right this beef castle has my full attention and I'm buying what he's selling. 

This guys name is the one man thrill ride and he wants us to understand that ever no means you are on step closer to you next "YEEEP!!" Its been awhile since my last yep so I could use all the help I can get. Thrill ride tells me all you need to get your next yep is the T-shirt that makes the man. That's right the one man thrill ride t-shift is an instant panty dropper. You just have to put on this shirt and chicks will instantly lose their minds just thinking about the one man thrill ride himself. Oh yeah is has nothing to do with you because you are a scrawny 160 lb sunken chest sexually deprived SUCK BAG, but its all about Jimmy Preston and his chiseled STEEL and SEEEEX appeal. When she sees that shirt she is going to want to be "ravished like a locomotive." Needless to say, but I bought three of these babies and can't wait to send babes to the ozone with a single pound. 

Next we come to the highlight of the video. The one man thrill ride kind of snuck this one in towards the end, but for anyone who stuck it out they were not disappointed.  "If you my friend experience an erection lasting longer than four hours than PAT yourself on the back. You have officially achieved mac status! YES that is double bonus points!" So many questions. What is mac status? Who is giving out bonus points? And what are they used for? Why would you want to be hard for over four hours? I guess I am clearly not ready to achieve mac status. Getting this t shirt might not have been the best idea. 

SEE YA DINKS!

-PC

P.S. After being called a sexually deprived suck bag by and advertisement I went for a run for the first time in like 8 years. It just took the one man thrill ride to call me a fat slob before I realized I have become a fat slob.